In today’s Curiously You podcast episode we are speaking with life coach Catarina Andrade, who supports women who are feeling overwhelmed in the transition into motherhood.
What’s great about this episode is that it address questions at every stage, both before, after, and ongoing:
– Before you’ve even decided you want to become a mother, how can you know whether it’s right for you?
– Do you want to go into motherhood by giving birth, or are other options open to you?
– Once decided on motherhood, how do you go about finding a partner to join you on this parenting journey?
Then there’s motherhood itself and the desire to do everything right and get everything done. Catarina provides us a more easeful way into motherhood that is, contrary to how it might feel, more calming for the family unit and provides a greater sense of confidence as a mother, and connection with your child.
You’ll love this episode if:
– Your career or otherwise focused and you’re not sure having a baby is right for you;
– You’re a mother and are constantly going through spurts of guilt when it comes to balancing parenthood and finding time for yourself;
– You know you need to surrender to the process, but you’re having a hard time doing it.
Time Stamped Notes
[05:38] Catarina found that advice and resources about motherhood were mainstream, viewing mothers as purely physical beings, rather than also considering the spiritual and energetic component of being.
Before coaching and teaching yoga, Catarina spent her time working in maternal and child-health in the non-profit world across ten countries in Africa. She believes that motherhood is a continuum and different needs that come up in journey, and women need support in order to deepen and widen their perspective.
[11:52] There is “mothering” work in the world that requires supporting, loving and care-giving traits, and so we are creators and we are all birthing something, whether it be a dream or a business. There is a regimented fixed view of motherhood, which should be shifted to more of an inherent quality rather than birthing an actual human child.
That being said, a woman needs to decide whether or not she wants to physically birth a child and take on the responsibilities of parenting. Catarina entry into motherhood started when she realized she wanted to be a mother, which for all women, is usually the first point of the continuum. She believes that motherhood can look very different if we drop the guilt and expectations.
[16:27] Some tips to connect with your internal wisdom are:
– Anything you can do to get really present; including meditation, dancing or whatever way you can get out of your head and into your heart;
– Create a visualisation of having a child and notice how your body reacts;
– Create a visualisation of not having a child and be aware of how your body reacts.
The body has all the answers, however the mind and the heart need to lead consciousness and awareness to the answer.
Catarina discusses her personal journey how she manifested her husband and ultimately a family by setting her intention when she became aware of the fact that she wanted to be a mother.
[26:26] Catarina discusses on how she found spirituality through accepting parts of herself and surrendering other parts to allow more flow into her life. After the birth of her son she became aware of her love to control things, and do things perfectly. Thoughts of failure went through her mind, and she realized something had to change. Catarina believes that she gave birth to her spirituality on the same day she gave birth to her son.
[32:24] One of the key ways Catarina remains productive (and encourages her clients to do the same) is by creating what she calls a “white space,” in her calendar. It’s a time scheduled every week that has to be honoured and utilised for self.
Some of her clients found that this time would generate stress and anxiety. Catarina suggested creating a list of 10 enjoyable things, and making sure to indulge in them during white-space time.
Society is overly focused on productivity in this world and how to fit it all in. The white space allows presence and awareness, and also declutters the brain therefore creating a white space in our minds as well.
[43:53] There are paradigms of motherhood that exist out there which usually entail suffering, sacrifice, and complaining. On the other end of the spectrum, motherhood is seen as natural and so easy.
Catarina saw motherhood as a spiritual journey instead of trying to fit into what was expected societally. She understood that she could co-create her own experience of motherhood. Self-care, and how she looked after herself, were ultimately a way to look after the whole family unit, her son, her husband and her household.
[01:04:00] Advice for burnt out mothers and women; trust that it’s going to be ok and that it’s normal. We all have those experiences, but it’s very rare that people talk about it. Catarina promises 250% that when you look back on it, something amazing is going to shift for you. The burnouts are such powerful break-through moments.
Get in Contact with Catarina Andrade:
Accessing Mama Love in Heated Moments Free training with Catarina Andrade starts October 8th, check it out at “The Fire Within”
Catarina’s recommended books:
The Desire Map: A Guide to Creating Goals with Soul by Danielle LaPorte
Take out your calendar and find a time for “white-space”, pen it in.
Come up with a list of 10 enjoyable things that you can do. Make a point to do one of those things during your allocated white-space time.
Let me know in the comments when your white space is, and what are some things you are considering doing?
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Thanks so much for tuning in to this episode curious friends, and until the next episode, take care of yourself.