I Was So Mad

I headed out with Mike today into our local town, one hour away from home. He had an appointment at the barber, I thought I would keep him company.

10 minutes from our destination, we called to say we would be arriving soon.

“Oh,” they said, “the barber is off sick today, and your appointment is not in the diary anyway. Sorry about that, try again tomorrow.”

“Fuming!” (I am angry, I had an expectation and it has fallen short).

“What a waste of time!” (I am unloved, they do not care for me).

“I could have spent this morning doing work!” (Fear, time is scarce, I cannot waste it).

Pause. Do I have to feel this way?

I got away from my desk and cured the cabin fever…

I needed some contact lens solution, so while I’m here, to the pharmacy…

Let’s check out the book shop, how about this book on Hygge, maybe some hot chocolate later…

I was so madI’m breathing. You’re breathing.

We’re getting married in 6 weeks.

And both healthy.

And about to get into a car…

that will drive us back to a warm home.

We tend to foster this arrogance that our place here on earth is secure.

But do we really have enough time left to squander it sitting with these corrupting emotions?

I’m just a regular girl who has grown up managing all the standard silly frustrations of life. I’m no zen master.

The choice to focus on the good is hard, but it IS a choice nonetheless.

So I managed to talk myself around this time (until the next), and allow the heat of the moment to pass, before another moment is wasted.


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1 comment
Joyce Hey says February 16, 2017

Good thoughts, Jen, but no Zen meditation whilst driving, though a little light chanting is permissible. You need all your powers of concentration on those narrow switchback roads in the back of beyond!

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